Thomas is on his way home from Virginia where he was playing his war-game with friends. I spent the entire day working like it was just another Monday.

I aged a lovely metal box, built another metal box, and picked out the things which I will use for the others. I have 5 in all. I then created some little metal cups for pearls for my two octopus pieces- so I can finish them finally. I also decided to make a tiny metal box for a sparrows leg. It will be a jewelry piece like None-Other! Haaa... I also worked on the new reliquary to scooters... Add in a could of trips in and out to the bathroom and to refresh my coffee. Take a few bites of some stuffing I had made for dinner the other night- and that was mostly my day.

*Sigh*

I probably should give myself a weekend to not do work- but it is truly hard to relax. All I think of now- is what I need to do/make and deadlines. Not that it is terrible- because I like those thoughts to some degree. It is just that I need to allow myself some time to not use my hands and brain.

Goodness- speaking of hands- mine are horribly aged from working so much- stained with all of the chemicals and patinas and- the nicks and scrapes from filing... No matter how much I scrub and wash them, they seem to just look the same... I guess I am secretly happy to see them so strong and so worked. But to the average person looking at me- well I am far from girlie!

I finished taking those pills which stopped my "Girl-Trouble" on Thursday. They completely screwed up my face- I am so broken out- I look like I have the chicken-pox. Luckily it is starting to subside and now I can feel my period beginning again. Hopefully this time I will not bleed for weeks. Uuugh! Damn it.

All of my complicated hormones have left me feeling at odds. I am somewhat down today. Makes sense I guess. I did not want to spend another full day working in the studio alone. I wanted to go play with Thomas and do mindless easy things like grocery shop and maybe ride my scooter for a change... I guess I can do it tomorrow- although I feel the SUNDAY blahs- coming. I always feel a little bit stressed about Sunday's.

Historically- Sunday is not one of my better days of the week. I feel the need to clean and well, Thomas is always thinking about Mondays... It just has never been a good day with the pressures of the approaching week... But I will try to make do.

So other than- all of that- I am waiting for him to get home and decide on what to do about dinner. Out or In- I am not sure. I am leaving it up to him to decide as he is the one who has been throwing dice all day and has driven back and forth to Virginia...

So there you have it. My day... mostly.
More later- as I need to go tidy myself up...
XoxoX
(I am still working on this little drawing... needs finishing)

Posted these on etsy!

Mr. Vespa and me...

Not one single anniversary of this terrible day- goes by, where I am not watching the memorials and feel such deep sadness for those who lost loved ones.
And I always burst into tears.
I do not cry much for things in life. I am not a crier.
But if there ever was one thing which seems to touch me so deeply- it is watching this universal grieving and overwhelming sadness that this day brings.

Today is not different than the past 7.
I still feel it.
I remember it.
And I think about HOW much has changed since that day.

Still waiting on the results of the blood work to reach the desk of my doctor and then filter to me... In the meantime I am back on track. The meds are working and the levies are holding.

NOW- about working as an artist...

Things are good so far.
I have not- NOT- worked one single day so far.
What I mean is, that even on the weekends and evenings I have been putting in time doing something work related.
NOW I understand what it is to be your business. I can not stop thinking about it.

Maybe in time this could become a problem- you know ALL WORK AND NO PLAY...

But for now- things are moving along.
(Yes- Thomas's new machine... he bought a Triumph motorcycle...)
I have to ship out some orders and then turn my attention to other art things.
I am running to the Gallery (Fleckenstein Gallery) today to drop off some things and regain a presence in a local gallery. That will be nice. I have some NEW little shrines which I need to finish making which will be featured in the Holiday Show! Huzzah! I also got accepted to Merry Mart Sunday December 7th!
In between all of this is teaching in Canada in Mid-October! Yowie!!!
AND! Add to this- I begin to work on my NEXT BOOK!!! I know! TICK TOCK!
Add to this- my deep desire to finish up a painting I have been working on as well as finishing a few drawings...
BUSY??? Haaa YES! Good and Busy!
Okay- so speaking of busy- I better get moving...
More from me... later.
(After I run perhaps! Yes- I decided to shut up and do it today- going to go up to the track and just give it a go... uuugh!)
XoxoxoX

Nothing like meeting a nice young gentleman for the first time and then hopping into the stirrups and having him look at your lady-business.
Uuugh...

So I guess I do not know much more than I did going in- other than what it could or could not be. However, according my my health records and my family history- It looks like I do not have much of anything wrong. He says his hunch is- I am stressed. Well- I do not think I feel that way. I am actually happy and excited to be working from home.
He did not actually "feel" anything weird going on- therefore- he thinks this is just a rare case of a hiccups to my system- of sorts. I know- what about the pain? Yes- I am in pain- and really stressed that to him- but he things it could be the fact that I have had my period for so long- or that I might have just pulled something...

The bottom line is- the results are still out and no one really knows anything.

I have a prescription to take care of the bleeding- Supposedly it will Re-Boot my system- stop the bleeding for 10 days and then when I stop the 10 day med's- I will begin my period again and be on track... if in fact this is nothing more than my system being out of whack...

You know- this is why I love getting hurt on the outside. I can see it and know how to fix it...

I should hear something in a few days...
XoxoxoX

My work week is now Monday- through- Sunday it seems! Haa...

Here are a few new things:

Now- back to work...Thank you for peeking!

In Late June I went to the dermatologist because I have been having strange excessive hair growing in very odd and unpopular places. I thought it was rather strange and so I made an appointment and went to see her. She said she wanted me to see my Gynecologist right away to check my hormone levels as she thought that this may be contributing to this strange wolf-man syndrome.

Uuugh- I have not been to the GYN in over 4 yrs I discovered- when I went to make an appointment. They told me that I was SOL. I had allowed too much time to pass and now I was considered NEW and that she was not accepting NEW!!! UUUGH! So I had to go and find a new one. After several phone calls around town- I managed to find a gentleman who was able to see me September 17th. Sounds like a long time to wait- but it was better than any other place I had called.

August comes and during the second week, I get my period as I normally do. The one thing which was different was I was having sever pain in my lower back (tail bone area) when I got up or sat down.

A week and a half goes by and I get my period again! The pain from my back issue is still hurting too. Things were getting weird. I asked a doctor at work and she suggested it was just stress and that getting your period twice happens...

TIME TICKS BY and my period is not stopping. I am still in pain. I now can feel pain inside as well as my lower back pain.

2 weeks and still not stopping.

I called the GYN's office back and I was told in more simpler terms- SUCK IT UP! (I kid you not). The receptionist explains to my that there are no openings and that if I am concerned to go to the ER.

WTF!

So I called my general doctor back and he explains that this seems to happen at those offices all the time and that I should be okay to wait it out. UUUGH!

By now I am really upset inside and feel like NO ONE IS WORRIED about this! I mean- COME ON- I am bleeding for over 14 days now! THAT IS NOT RIGHT!

So on Friday- having not been able to sleep the night before because I was so pissed off- I called the GYN again and asked to have the Doctor call me back. HOURS GO BY and I have not heard anything. I call back and ask about my previous message- HE never was given the message it seems- so they put a nurse on the phone.

SHE begins to tell me that she can not help me and that I will have to wait until the 17th to see the doctor because I am new and that they do not have my case history on me. I stated to get angry and I began to explain things to her in terms she might understand- I say- I AM concerned and want to know if I REALLY can wait this out. She starts to ask some questions and says that perhaps I am just pregnant. HA! NO- I am not and explain to her why that is not possible. She then says it could me early menopause- and asks me about my some family things- I tell her- No family history of any illnesses, menopause occurred in my family around the 50's and that I have personally- have had no illness or anything- ever- especially down there. I am super healthy. I say to her- IF this way YOU or someone you knew- WOULD YOU JUST SUGGEST WAITING? And then I said- TELL Me I am being unreasonable...

She then says- Oh- I do have a cancellation on Monday. But don't expect much because you will need tests and so on...

OKAY- REALLY? UUUGH! NOW you magically have an Opening?!?!?!

I need to get seen now. Waiting until Sept 17th to get the ball rolling will put my into October and Honestly- I CAN NOT BLEED THAT LONG! I am going to become anemic!

Fuck! What do I have to do to have someone take me seriously???

I was ready to go down to that office and sit there and wait until someone saw me if I didn't get some kind of answer on the phone.

Okay- so where does this leave me?
Here I am at 2:40 Sunday morning and I am still in pain, I am really bleeding now (I think I may have my normal period again) and I am anxious about Monday. I know something is wrong inside. I can feel it and I just know. According to Wiki- it must be an ovarian cyst. Hair growth, bleeding, pain...
Who knows- but at least I am going to be seen on Monday. Damn it.

If there is ONE thing which I hate most in life- is having to fight these kinds of battles- for your RIGHTS. It totally sucks.
More on this- when I know more...

xxxooxxx

Finished and now... on my ETSY shop.
XxooxX

I never knew what real work was all about until I started doing this full time. I am exhausted. My hands look like the hands of an old woman- well- strong and thin and just aged. They do all of my work these days. I move around and hardly sit. By the time 4:00pm gets here- I can barely stand. It is because I am used to sitting in a chair for 8 hours a day. BUT it all feels so good. Well- sort of like I am playing hooky still or on a weird working vacation. The most noticeable thing about this- is how fast time passes. I look at the clock and it is after noon time and I panic! It feels like I just got started.

I will get into a groove.
I will learn to set up a good schedule...

Right now- I am just trying to make enough things to stock up my ETSY store...

Now- to bed for me.
In a few hours, Thomas flies out to Vegas to play at Games Day. Lots of men mostly having some fun. Thomas earned it... he doesn't need the wife tagging along although he has said it would have been nice to make it into a mini-vacation. Haaa- nice boy he is.

So it is up at 5:00am for me to see him off...
Off to bed now... more tomorrow

XoxoxoX
(DAMN CAT is racking up my minutes!)