May 7, 2009

  • There comes a time in life when...

    SIGH
    So I needed to stop and write for a few minutes before I being to tackle one of the biggest issues of my life...
    HA! Sounds HUGE when I put it like that- but it actually is something which I have known about and have been in a bit of denial for some time.
    I tend to buy too much without much feeling. I have too much stuff in my life. It is overflowing with clutter of nothingness.
    If it all disappeared today I would not even care- because I do not even know WHAT I own!
    I am embarrassed and ashamed.
    It has been nagging at me for a long time and all I do is stack up another Tupperware in the basement and forget.

    Well...

    Today I make a change. Or so I hope.
    I am going to tackle the first 21 containers of clothes which I have been holding onto since I moved into this house. (There are a few more things in an upstairs closet and I suspect there are more things still hiding in containers in other places-Uugh!)
    I never throw anything away really. I hold onto crap out of guilt.

    But you know.
    I am tired of feeling like my life is out of control.
    I think it is time to really account for all of these things in my life.

    No no- I mean- we all have sides of this in our lives in some degree or another perhaps? It is just that, well... I am feeling restless. I can not relax when I am in this house. I feel like it is an extension of my whole life. Too scattered. Too chaotic. I love order. Even if it is some weird kind of Jane Order... it still means it is under control.

    Ahhh... it is time to sort things out in life.

    So after something to eat and drink... I will do this.
    Tomorrow I shall begin to take these things to the thrift store and be done with it.

    It will be good.
    It has to be.

    More later...
    xox

Comments (1)

  • I understand what a huge breakthrough this is. I've gotten better about this in recent years. I've finally stopped acquiring incessantly. I think it started for me in college because I had so few things growing up. Now I realize that letting go is freeing and allows space for new things to enter into my life. (Or maybe it's just that I can't fit into sample sizes anymore and therefore I don't collect the show discards at Neiman Marcus?! Ha!) I remember having a hard time getting rid of my father's bathrobe. I mean... gross... who keeps a bathrobe! Right?! It was just one of the many things I seemed unable to let go of... but I finally did. This is very inspiring to me! How is the new kitty!  xoxox

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